In my last post, I talked about Communication Killers, and discussed 7 Wrong Responses that can shut the door to communication with our children. Today I want to focus on the positives, and share some keys to better communication. Remember, communication with our children is a HUGE part of winning and keeping their hearts, so it’s something we need to always be working on!
Ideas to help you build better communication with your children:
1. Ask open ended questions.
Don’t ask questions that can be answered with a ‘yes’ or ‘no’.
2. Ask about what interests them.
Find out what they are excited about, and ask them about it often.
3. Acknowledge their emotions.
Respond with “I bet that made you feel sad, hurt, happy, scared,” etc.
4. Stop what you’re doing and look at them.
This shows that you care and are really interested in hearing what they have to say.
5. Ask when, where, or how, not why.
“Why?” sounds accusatory.
6. Be aware of their spirit.
Sometimes they may seem to be having a bad attitude, but it is really hiding a hurt or difficulty they are dealing with.
7. Let them finish what they are saying before you try to respond.
8. Be available.
We can’t schedule a time daily or weekly for our kids to bare their hearts to us. This comes through spending time with them, and happens when they are ready to talk or need to talk. It can’t be forced.
Remember, time spent listening to your children and communicating with them, is always time WELL spent!